The Side Chick That Refused to Cheat Herself

There once was a girl who wanted to have it all. A great career, travel to distant lands and to find true love. On her quest to discover herself a long the way she encountered some unique experiences. She met someone whom ignited her inside, made her feel alive, and allowed her to fall in love. Everything seemed perfect. Seemed ordained and designed because she thought “Finally, I have what I’ve been waiting for. What I deserve.” Then one day the girl discovered that the person she had fallen for belonged to someone else. He came with about three suitcases filled with baggage. The girl accepted, gave him the benefit of the doubt and still chose to love him. Instead of seeing red flags and protecting her heart form the start of things, she opened herself up to the man even more. Her faith was in him. He was after all a dream come true. The man was educated, handsome, successful, and masculine. She allowed him into the deepest parts of her psyche,trusted him with her affections and began thinking that possibly the future could be a reality.

For months, she enjoyed getting to know this man. During this time, his love contained specific boundaries and conditions that she was not always comfortable with. But, she continued to compromise her dignitary, morals, and self-respect all for him. In return he swept her off her feet lavishly. He paid attention and bought her things that she needed and wanted and flew miles just to be with her. The girl felt special. Like the luckiest woman in the world. That was until he couldn’t figure out what he actually wanted. She began to see that all of these things were set in place to pacify her and quiet doubts that would creep up every now and again. You see, this girl thought very highly of herself and she could never truly feel secure with him if she wasn’t the one… his only one. But, she wanted the man…. so she carried on.

Recently, I ran into this same girl. I asked her, “How is your love doing? Where is he now?” The girl responded, “We broke up.” She looked as if her inner light had dimmed just a little and she was heartbroken. I asked the girl “Why?” And she said…. “I wanted to do what was right.” So I asked her, “Dont you love him? Leaving him is hard right?” In return, she took my hand and said, “I not only love him, but I’m in love with him. I breathe him. But, if I stayed it would mean that I love a man more than myself and more than God.”

You see, the girl had an epiphany, brought on by an email she received earlier that week filled with photos of him happy with someone else, living a different life. She was insanely jealous and questioned everything he had ever told her. She felt used. She thought back to when they first met and the wages of her sin. This girl knew she could have better if she just believed better was around the corner. However, she regretted not a single moment with the man but she wished they had met at a different time and he had been more honest with her.

I thought long and hard about what the girl was telling me. I looked at the way she bravely smiled at me holding back tears. And I thought… What an unlucky woman in love! I was upset at why she couldn’t get what she wanted after all this time! I was mad at him for hurting my friend! If there was anyone that deserved to fall in love it was her! But, then I thought about how very lucky she actually was to be getting away in hind-site. The karma she would receive would be filled with blessings. This young woman should have been proud of herself. Yes, she could have fought for him, but why fight something that should come so easily and natural? What she did was something people twice her age have not been able to do in all of eternity. She has mastered the art of letting go in order to receive something greater. At what cost did she choose to love this man?

The girl let go and so did he. They mutually understood that it is for the greater good. She secretly confessed to me that she hoped the universe would blow him back into her life under better circumstances but she knew better than to ever dream that dream. Life is what you make it and time spent thinking of the what ifs is time wasted. Everyone has a situation they may need to walk away from or a specific relationship that is unhealthy, therefore this person was certainly not alone in the world. She is a beautiful, talented, and magnetic woman. The same way she attracted one successful man is the same way that she will go on to attract someone else who will have the true capacity to love her wholeheartedly and unconditionally.

The law of attraction is real. It has been hard for her, but in the name of sacrifice, in any area of your life, you have to understand that in order to gain everything you may have to give up something and it’s not always what you want.

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